Milestone

We Are Family

She's a toot, our sweetpea,
our pride and joy!

Kayla Elizabeth

was adopted on
May 29, 1997
at 1:47pm

Weight 51 lbs. 6 oz.
Length: 45 1/2 inches

That's the photo and prose that was mailed out on homemade cards to friends and family many years ago. I've been quiet of late because a family milestone was reached Sunday which took some preparation. Kayla met her birth mother.

We have been working towards this for some time but one thing or another would sabotage the meeting and the process would begin all over again. But finally, finally it happened.

I cannot divulge the intimacy of this all-important meeting here but I have been encouraged to let you know where I've been for those of you who might be interested. Photography, writing and traveling about simply hasn't been on my mind. We've entered a new chapter in our lives. A chapter of forgiveness and acceptance, of moving forward and not looking backward - a chapter that is already making a difference in our day to day lives and family structure. I'm posting this today on our 14th wedding anniversary. My, how time flies!

Turn the page.

I love you, Kayla Elizabeth.

Saying and Singing What It Knew: I Can

“A certain day became a presence to me;

there it was, confronting me —

a sky, air, light: a being.

And before it started to descend

from the height of noon,

it leaned over and struck my shoulder

as if with the flat of a sword,

granting me honor and a task.

The day’s blow rang out, metallic —

or it was I, a bell awakened,

and what I heard was my whole self

saying and singing what it knew: I can.”

Denise Levertov, Variation on a Theme by Rilke

(The Book of Hours, Book I, Poem 1, Stanza 1)

Singing in the Dark

For weeks now I've been hearing the most beautiful birdsong outside my window. Surely a warbler, I said to myself. So lyrical and crystal clear and unusual. Finally, I spied the singer sitting atop my front porch light singing for all the world like he was Pavarotti. Is it already time to seek a mate? It's January, my birdie friend, and freezing cold outside. Yes, the nest from last year is still safely ensconced within the porch light frame (we removed the bulb so they could safely and privately procreate and raise their family last summer), however shouldn't you do a little housecleaning first? Obviously he disagrees, as he sits within the nest and calls out for hours hoping for love.

This morning, walking Miss Baylee at a chilly 5:30am in the complete dark I hear him singing loudly. Why does a house finch sing in the dark, on a cold January morning? Frost is glistening in the sodium lights. His song is so beautiful, his heart so filled with love and longing.

That he sings in the dark is to me a metaphor for hope, and for determination, and an example of the eternal optimist. I wish you well, little house finch and pray you find your mate soon!

Oh, the porch light is yours for another year.